A thousand apologies for my long silence. I came out of retreat to find that I had overbooked myself, editing wise, and had a long list of things to do, all on tight deadlines. I’ve just spent a desperate fortnight shuffling jobs.

They weren’t all paid jobs. It was Specusphere time (see link in my profile) and the whole team of volunteers was frantically getting things ready for the publication date of 1 May. On the last day of April I was up until 3.00am, writing, editing and uploading. It was with a long sigh of relief that I finally fell into bed. But when I checked the site next morning it all looked very worthwhile indeed. Our doughty Editor-in-Chief, Stephen Thomson, had also had a late night and an early morning, getting the front page in order so all our new uploads could stand up and be counted. There are interviews with K.E. Mills, Sean Williams, Paul Collins and Tony Plank; two film reviews and no fewer than ten book reviews, plus fiction, poetry and features including my report on Swancon. I’m very proud of the fact that I wrote the editorial, too – the first one I’ve ever written! Amanda, Astrid, Stephen and I are now eagerly watching the hits mount up. It’s obvious that we have regular readers lying in wait for each edition to go live.

As well as handing out kudos to rest of the editorial team, Stephen Thomson, Amanda Greenslade and Astrid Cooper, I’d like to mention my wonderful reviewers. Bobbi Sinha-Morey and Joan Malpass are two regular contributors: Bobbi specializes in reviewing fantasy-romance and Joan is especially good with children’s fantasy. Both have written film reviews as well as book reviews. I am proud of them and our other reviewers. E-zines can’t survive without volunteers, so if you love Speculative Fiction I would urge you to offer your services. The Specusphere is always looking for new blood, as are many other e-zines.

Paid work included final editing of a PhD thesis for an architecture student, the first I’d done in that discipline. I enjoyed the work, but when I agreed to do it I’d forgotten that The Specusphere’s May edition was going up at the same time! To make matters worse, I am engaged in a series of house-sits at present, which, since I don’t have a laptop of my own, means that I have been using web-mail and other people’s computers – a deadly combination. Downloads failed, attachments didn’t attach, mail disappeared into cyberspace or else arrived in duplicate or triplicate. I should’ve read my ephemeris before starting on this last fortnight’s work! I probably would have stayed on retreat.

Speaking of which, the retreat was excellent. Vipassana meditation forces one to face oneself, which can be pretty scary, but, as Akiro Kurasawa, one of the greatest of film producers, is quoted as saying, “To be an artist means never to avert your eyes”. Learning not to avert one’s eyes from the unavoidable pain of life is one of the gifts of Vipassana. Being in silence for a lengthy period of time is in itself very confronting. It forces us to look at the constant inane chatter that makes up our thought streams and then to look beyond it. Then, as TS Elliot said at the end of his Four Quartets:

And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.

The retreat was a gift, and now it’s time to make use of its fruits. As well as some hints of deeper insight, many writing ideas arose and as a result I’ve drafted still another outline of The Trilogy. I have still to hear the comments of my peers and betters – which reminds me that I have heaps of reviewing to catch up on next. I’d better get on with it!